*turns bright red, runs away*
1. The holidays can be stressful when you have gift-opening anxiety.
Presents are the stuffs of my nightmares.
2. Because your face just doesn’t seem to know what to do while opening a present.
Am I smiling enough? Too much? Am I grimacing? Smi-macing maybe?
3. Which means that the days leading up to G-Day can leave you a husk of your former self.
G-Day = the day on which a combat attack is to be initiated against THE GIFTS.
4. On Christmas Day, you try to get your head in the game.
5. And when the gift-opening commences, you try not to panic.
6. When you look around, you notice everyone else effortlessly expressing their gift-opening joy.
7. And then it’s your turn to open a gift.
This is the moment you’ve been waiting for.
8. And at first, your mouth decides to say some exclamatory word without your permission.
Sometimes it’s “ah” or “oh” or “ooooooo” or sometimes it’s just a sound like “awwwyoushouldntsmshhhhhda.”
9. But then you feel like a dork so you keep it cool with a heartfelt “thank you.”
10. And then you get nervous so you overcompensate.
11. So you start talking about some of the present’s cool ~features~ and you’re totally not making sense now.
“What I love about this hat is that it’s also a wool bowl.”
12. And you insist on doing some kind of role-play with the item to show how perfect it is for you.
13. All the while you’re looking around the room smiling like a MANIAC because you just want it to be over.
14. And everyone’s just like:
15. And you’re still like:
16. And all the other joyous gift openers move on.
17. And you’re finally free — UNTIL NEXT YEAR.