The Lovey-Dovey couple: Lasts for a couple months, even possibly a year at the most. They're the ones who make you sick to your stomach with mushy love garbage. Don't worry though, in a couple months it will be over.
The Geographer: Checks in everywhere. Where are your friends all the time? Do you want to know. Personally, IDGAF, but apparently, your friends find it necessary to tell you where they are everywhere. Big brother doesn't even have to do any work anymore!
The Gamer: __________< insert name, want you to join ____________< insert game here.
When I am on facebook, I don't care about your games.
The Parents: they don't really understand how facebook works, but they're there. Beware of the personal baby pictures. They'll embarrass you to death.
The Pet: Animals now apparently have facebooks and can consciously decide whether or not they want to be your friend. Ok, this one I have to admit is kind of cute.