With 650 little monsters in the ever growing ranks of Pokemon, it would only stand to reason that a few of their names would be lacking in the originality department. It doesn’t seem to be too difficult to name the little guys. But sometimes, you gotta get lazy when it comes to doing just that.
Here’s what a normal coffee fueled and excited Tuesday in the Pokemon naming department must have sounded like:
Dude 1: What is that one and what does he do?
Dude 2: He’s a lizard that burns things.
Dude 1: Hmm, well charring is an interesting way of burning and the giant salamander is a native to our region of Japan. Charmander?
Dude 2: Brilliant!
But sometimes a batch of new Pokemon come through the office on a sleepy Friday afternoon before a long holiday weekend and you end up with something like this:
Dude 1: How many more do we have?
Dude 2: Ten…
Dude 1: *sigh* Come on then.
Dude 2: This one is a heart shaped disc.
Dude 1: LUVDISC! WOOO! LONG WEEKEND HERE WE COME!
Dude 2: Sure, yeah, whatever. *tweets his plans for the weekend from his Pokephone*
Has that happened? Perhaps. The following is our roundup of 10 Lazy Pokemon names that must have resulted from a lack of caffeine at the Pokemon Naming Institute.
Wait. What did you say? Spell it backwards? S-N-A-K-E. Dammit! Really? You just flipped the spelling? That’s so lazy that there’s probably a keyboard shortcut for that. We would have thought of this earlier if we knew they were taking naming advice from Missy Elliot’s “Work It”.
Not kidding you. The naming process for this pokemon had lots of onomatopoeia.
You can tell the people who named this pokemon wanted some ice cream.
Alright, I'll give you guys credit for this one. At least it wasn't 'Spig'.
Ok come on now.
There are only so many ways you can mash up Sea and Horse, and one is already taken. Although it could be referring to the infantile form of horse that so many kids shout at the petting zoo, but somehow I doubt that.
Really? This name is so lazy that it could have been made by a hurried typing accident. Someone was typing up the narration for a nature program when they saw the genius that auto-correct missed.
Krabby is a unique case in the realm of Pokemon names. It not only describes the origins and look of the Pokemon it is ascribed to, but it might accurately describe the feelings of the people who named the poor little guy. This one has to have been a cruel joke that made it past the copy editors. The writers were having a rough day.
This Pokemon is particularly sad. During the naming process, the monster under the giant beam wasn’t even taken into account. The namers were too busy picking out letters from a Scrabble bag to try and spell girder with twice as many r’s to nab that triple word score. Look at him. He’s just sitting there with a name taken from the thing he is holding. He looks depressed. Let’s call him Pokemuscles. (Hey, we never said we were good at this naming thing either.)
This thing doesn’t even have a face. What does it evolve in to, a chandelier? Regardless of how desperate the Pokemon designers are getting for new monsters, Lampent is sinking to an all new low when it comes to nomenclature.
Here we have come to the laziest name of all. Why is it the laziest? Because it does not adhere to the nonsensical conventions of every other Pokemon. It doesn’t flip flop letters, smash together sounds, or describe what sort of powers whirl about inside this little guy. Instead, someone decided to apply the logic of “piglet” to a duck and add an extra t just for good measure. It is logical, boring, and most of all, lazy. Three attributes that none of us want from the world of Pokemon.