Oh, you think they're awesome and cute 'cause they're just like us? Wrong. They're the worst.
Yes, some monkeys are cool and fashionable and famous.
But guess what?
Most monkeys are just stupid little jerks.
They make you look bad in pictures.
They steal from you when you're standing RIGHT THERE.
They hate nice little kids.
They like sticking their jerk butts in your face.
They get drunk and hungover and expect you to take care of them.
Basically, they are OUT OF CONTROL.
They are selfish monsters.
They tear shit up.
They pick up bad habits from celebrities.
They don't even like their kids associating with children.
They hog the bathtub.
They don't follow the rules.
THEY FLING THEIR POOP.
And they're big fat jerks.