I know what you’re thinking. Actually, I don’t — Obama does. It’s true. But if you’re anything like me, you’re probably thinking of one of these two things at any given time:
While Apple has yet to release an edible iPhone (one day!), there are serious rumors floating around about a gold iPhone. Everyone from Techcrunch to iMore seems to be talking about it. It’s rumored that the gold iPhone will be part of the 5S series and not the super-cheap plastic iPhone 5C.
The golden iPhone will probably inspire more nerd boners than Olivia Wilde in a geisha outfit; there may be a possibility that Apple will make the gold iPhone a “limited edition” model like their U2 branded iPods from way back in 2004. Of course, this is Apple that we’re talking about — and the Apple rumor mill is pretty f**king ridiculous for all us simpletons out there.
Admit it. You want to touch it. You want to own it. You probably want to smell it. You want to walk down the street with it and have strangers genuflect at your feet. “There goes he,” they will say, “The man with the golden iPhone,” and you will know it to be true, and you shall harness the powers of the golden iPhone and become the master of the cellular universe. Or you’ll use it to text your last girlfriend at 4am after a night of near-prodigious drinking. You know. Whichever.