Sometimes, when you’re sitting in the waiting room at the doctor’s office and there’s nothing to read except months old magazines and pamphlets about cholesterol, it can be easy to see a picture of a celebrity making a stupid face on the cover of, say, People magazine, and think to yourself “UGH SO-AND-SO HAS SUCH A STUPID DUMB FACE AND I HATE HIM/HER AND I WANT HIM/HER TO DIE,” because, at that moment, that person only exists in the fanciful world of television and professional photo shoots. Then you think, “You know what? I should tell everyone,” and you can, because you have a smart phone with a Twitter app and the Internet is basically magic. So you tap it out real quick and hit send, including the celebrity’s Twitter handle, and then the nurse calls your name and you head back to the exam room and never think about it again.
But then that tweet travels through the air. And yeah, it gets seen by all your followers, some of whom may retweet or reply with some variation of “Right?” or “Ugh, I know.” But it also can be seen by that celebrity, who, it turns out, does not live in an alternate magical universe, and has decided to quickly glance at his or her replies while eating breakfast. Or it can be seen by one of the producers on Jimmy Kimmel Live, who can take it and have the celebrity read it on air, with your handle clearly displayed on the screen, as part of the show’s hilarious “Mean Tweets” segment. And then you look like a jackass.